Facts that can help you to understand people and their nature I 13 Principles to recognize people I mydearstudents.in
HOW
TO RECOGNIZE PEOPLE
BHASKAR JYOTI BORAH
“Learning
is acquired by reading books, but the much more necessary learning, the
knowledge of the world, is only to be acquired by reading men, and studying all
the various editions of them.”
— Lord Chesterfield, “Letters to
His Son”
Being human, people are fundamental to our
lives. We live, learn and grow with people. We can't dream about our happiness, success and relationship without people. But people are of varied natures. There are some people who provide us immense love, affection, guidance and care. To the contrary there are also some people in our societies whom if we can’t recognize rightly
may hamper our path to self development and success. We must be able to
recognize them properly. Failing to recognize people will affect us reversely.
People are subject to betrayal. They live long with those people by failing to
recognize whom, they not only get betrayed but also compromise with their own success.
To be successful in life therefore we must have some knowledge of recognizing
people rightly. May it be in Business, Politics or Family Relationship, without
recognizing the right people we can’t expect becoming successful in anyone of
our ventures. Here I am writing about the fundamentals of recognizing people
and also 13 Principles to recognize people rightly. Keep on reading.
Importance of knowing who
is a friend:
There is a proverb, “A friend in need is a
friend in deed.” We can recognize people rightly only when we are in troubles.
People show their true colours only during our sufferings. When time is with
us, money is with us, power is with us, then everyone remains with us. But if
something wrong happen to us and we fall at the mercy of other people, then it
becomes very easier to recognize them. Realities reveal on time; not before,
nor after; but exactly on time. But here in this writing I am going to write
about some basic principles of knowing and understanding the nature of people.
Recognizing foes:
A person is not a foe if he criticizes you. A
person is not a foe simply because he dislikes you. An enemy or foe is a person
whose acts harm your development. An enemy is the one who puts you in trouble.
A person who willingly defames you is your foe; a person who conspires against
you is a foe; a person who joins the group of your enemy is a foe; a person who
never extends his helping hand to you in need is also a foe. Never rely on
these types of people. However if you have enemies then it is time for introspection that why people become your enemies or foes. If
you yourself make people your enemies then you can’t expect lasting success in
your life.
Recognize people by the
food they eat:
The Bhagavad Gita says that there are three
natures of people – Rajasika, Tamasika and Satwika. Rajasika implies the nature
of the people dominated by pride, ego and emotion. Tamasika signifies the ignorant nature of the people. And Satwika refers to the nature that resemblances purity. These three natures are determined by
the food we take. The subtle part of the food we take, become our mind. It is therefore food plays a greater role in determining the nature of people. People who always prefer hot, rich, spicy and non-vegetarian
food have a general tendency to be more emotional, desire-driven, egoistic and even sometimes short-tempered. People who mostly take stale and fermented food are dominated by inactivity and reluctance. The talents of these people remain hidden. They can't unleash their true potential. People who take balanced diet have more patience and intelligence with brilliant actions.
However all these attributes of the
three groups of people are only one aspect of studying the nature of people and
recognizing them. These natures basically exist among all human beings. Therefore we can analyze and find out the nature predominant in people by the food they eat. All the various aspects of the study of knowing and
understanding people are relative. Therefore do not come to a conclusion
immediately without understanding all the factors.
Recognize people by the
company they keep:
People also can be easily recognized by the
company they keep. They can live either in good company or in bad company. Know
the company and you can tell the nature of a person. Good Company implies group
of wise people, people of good habits, good behaviour and good deeds. To the
contrary by Bad Company I want to mean People who are not rational, aimless
with bad habits that injure body, mind and spirit and more importantly they
have a tendency to pollute the society which may not be necessarily with an immediate
effect.
Recognize people by the
books they read:
The
nature of people can also be recognized by the books they read. As the temperament
of people, so are the books they read. Mahatma Gandhi was very much influenced
by John Ruskin's, “Unto this last.” Some of the favourite
books of Bill Gates are: i) Jordan Ellenberg’s - How Not to be Wrong; ii) Where Good Ideas Come From by Steven Johnson iii) Ryoichi Mikitani and Hiroshi Mikitani’s - The Power to Compete. Some of the favourite
books of A.P.J. Abdul Kalam were Thirukural - Written by Thiruvalluvar; Man the Unknown by the Nobel laureate and doctor-turned-philosopher
Alexis Carrel and Light from Many Lamps:
A Treasury of Inspiration by Lillian Eichler Watson. By knowing the quality of the books read by people, we can understand the quality of their mind. Therefore books very much help us to recognize people.
Balance between words and actions:
People
can be best judged by the balance they maintain between words and their
actions. A person who seldom keeps his words is not at all trustworthy. However
sweet may be his manners but if during the course of his action he differs from
his words, he is not reliable and trustworthy. Better to be careful with this type of people before you believe in them. There is no
other better way to recognize people than this. The essence of every
relationship is faith. Where there is a lack of faith and doubts surmount, the
identity of a person gets clearly revealed.
People speak
about themselves:
It
is a reality that people speak about their own nature by themselves. People
give their identity in their behaviour and their actions and movements. But it
is our want or lack of knowledge that we fail to recognize them. Here I am
listing down some of the basic principles that I feel is important to recognize
people rightly.
13 Principles to Recognize People Rightly:
1. Don’t
judge people in the first meeting.
2. Take
time to recognize people correctly particularly the one with whom you want to
continue a relationship for a longer duration that involves faith.
3. Recognize
yourself truly to know other people. As you sow, so you reap. You will get in
return what you give to others.
4. Observe
carefully the words, actions and behaviour of people. When a person maintains
balance in his words and deeds, he is trustworthy. To the contrary who has
never bothered about keeping their promises to others!! Never rely upon such a
person.
5. Most
of the people in today’s world are selfish. But don’t blame them for what they
are. They are the product of their own situations. Help them when they ask for,
in need. If not possible to help them, say ‘no’ graciously. It is very easy to
recognize people who only approach you with a purpose. Once their needs get
fulfilled they will forget you the very next day.
6. Know
the heart of the people. If you can understand what people love and dislike,
then only you can truly understand them.
7. There
are some people who live with certain principles either good or bad, based upon
their own choices. If you can recognize the principles they follow, you will
recognize them without any doubt.
8. But remember most of the people are
hypocrites. They don’t know what they want, which direction to follow and
become confused very often. They are jealous of the success of other people
without being aware of the fact that they themselves are capable of doing that.
And they start backbiting. Recognize these people by their inconsistency in
their behaviour. Their mood changes frequently.
9. You
must live in truth to understand the truths and realities of life. Sometimes we
don’t know what we are doing, how we are doing without any concern for how it
affects other people’s life. We will not be able to recognize the truth if we
run away from realities. We must learn to face them to understand them.
10. Face
is the mirror of a person’s nature. With careful observations of the facial
expressions also a person can be recognized. But it needs experiences.
11. Know
the family background of the people. To which family they belong? What is their
profession? What is their reputation in the society? What is their social role?
Do they have any previous records that may help you to understand them better?
Who are their friends? Who are their enemies? Etc.
12. Analyze
the behaviour of the people. Try to know their thought process. Try to
understand why a person uses to behave in a particular manner. In the same
situation how different people reacts and why?
13. One
of the most effective ways of recognizing people correctly is to be friendly
with them. People can be best judged when they get freedom to express
themselves. Create conditions so that they can reveal their true nature.
You should apply your knowledge to
understand people on the basis of your requirements only. Don’t generalize all
categories of people. Be particular to your needs and analyze accordingly. Do not come to a conclusion
immediately without understanding all the factors.
You must know properly the answers
of the following questions:
i)
Whom you want to recognize?
ii)
Why you want to recognize?
iii)
What is your time limit to recognize?
After knowing the people rightly,
behave accordingly. Restrict those people’s approach to you, who may act
harmfully against you. Deny access to them internally and outwardly it depends
upon your own personal choice to decide what to do with those people. Give
importance to people as they require in your lives. Never prioritize wrong
people over the right one.